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greta eskridge

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5 Things We Learned On Our Not So Perfect Family Vacation

October 24, 2018

I know it’s easy to look at other people’s family vacation photos and romanticize them. We can’t help thinking, “our family vacations are a mess! Someone’s always unhappy. Or has to pee. Needs a snack. Is tired. Or wants to go home. What’s wrong with us?” Those other people have all the cute travel outfits, no one is sunburned or dirty, and they’re having all the fun, artsy, studious, and adventurous outings. In short, their vacation is perfect.

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I’m here to dispel the myth. Guess what? There’s no such thing as a perfect family vacation. For us, there are all kinds of glorious vacation moments, sprinkled with a whole lot of far less magical ones. It’s taken me years to accept that when we travel with 6 people, the odds of all 6 of us being happy at once, all the time, are almost zero. Especially if you have a passionate child or two, like I do. They sometimes struggle with the constant fun and activity of vacation.
And you know what, THAT’S OK!
We can still have a fabulous time, even if one person in the group isn’t loving it as much as the rest. Because at some point on the trip, we all will be happy. Maybe even at the same time! I’ll hold onto those moments so tightly. And then I’ll just laugh at the others.

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For example, the other day we were about 3 hours into our family vacation. That’s right. 3 hours! We’d just finished eating breakfast together and I wanted to tour the beautiful Santa Barbara courthouse. I’ve wanted to visit for years but every time I suggest it the kids are anxious to get back on the road and finish the rest of our journey. But this time I put my foot down. “We’re doing it! It’s beautiful and amazing and I know you’ll love it”

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All 4 of my kids voiced complaints. They’re usually so good about following me on adventures. But for some reason they just couldn’t get on board with visiting this place. So many years of saying no meant they’d decided it was no forever? I don’t know why they so stubbornly refused, bu no one wanted to go. They were sure we needed to get back on the road. and head towards our final destination. I was irritated by their stubbornness. And even what I perceived to be their selfishness. “Really? You can’t just say, “ok mom. We’ll do it for you!” They couldn’t. I ended the conversation by telling them to stop being jerks and I marched off towards the courthouse.😬😂

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That shook them up and a couple changed their tune immediately. Mom tantrums can do that. The others took a bit longer. But by the time we were done touring that beautiful building, guess what? They ALL thought it was really cool! And they were glad we went. I knew that would be the outcome, and that’s why I pushed back against their push back.

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What’s more, that little adventure will become family lore. “Remember when mom called us jerks and none of us cared about seeing the architecture of the Santa Barbara courthouse but mom made us go anyway? And then we actually liked it!”
See? I gave them that. Mom tantrums always make the best stories. A few tantrums here and there over the course of their childhood is really a gift you give to them to carry into adulthood and chuckle over with their siblings for many years to come.

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The truth is, there are so many lessons to be learned on family vacations. These are lessons I hope my kids will take with them into life, while vacationing and also while just living. Here are 5 we learned in the first 3 hours of our family vacation this year.

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  1. The destination isn’t the goal. Enjoy the journey. Don’t be so driven to get to the destination that you forget to stop and enjoy life along the way. 

  2. Family vacations aren’t all about any one person. None of life is! So even if this isn’t your favorite part of the trip, make an effort to enjoy it for the person who is loving it. 

  3. Say yes to new things. There’s a good chance you’ll be happily surprised by something you imagine will be boring or dumb. Life is full of wonderful surprises. 

  4. It’s ok if not everyone’s happy. The trip isn’t ruined if all the people aren’t happy all the time. There will be moments when everyone is happy. And that will be wonderful! And for the other moments, you just hug the unhappy person and say, “I’m sure we’ll do something you love later.” And give them some time to adjust their attitude without letting it ruin yours. 

  5. Mom is always right. Well not always. But a lot of the time. And I can say this with conviction because my mom was right about so many things. 

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Whether it’s a trip to a local destination or you’re traveling far from home, there is so much to learn when we adventure together. And even in the moments that are less than stellar, all is not lost. You know my motto, “it will make a great story later.” It always does!

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If you happen to be in Santa Barbara, I can’t recommend a visit to this spectacular courthouse enough. Yes, even if your kids don’t want to go. Its free to go inside, explore, and climb to the top of the tower for beautiful views. You can find visiting hours and how to take a free tour with a docent by visiting this site here. I’m already looking forward to going back and learning more about this beautiful spot.
Cheers to adventure, and embracing all the not so perfect, but still wonderful parts of our lives.

Greta

In adventuring
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Falling In Love With My Body Again

April 24, 2018

Guys, I want to talk about body image. And aging. And exercise. Let’s get down to the nitty gritty. (All my Nacho fans out there, holla!). After a 7 month hiatus from working out, my body is finally healed enough that I’m able to exercise again. It’s been glorious! It's been humbling. And I've learned a lot.

It started with a step aerobics class that my sweet, encouraging husband invited me to take with him a couple weeks ago. (read about it here) Not because he’s a big step aerobics fan, but because he knew I needed to start somewhere, and step aerobics seemed low key. It was so fun. And it was hard! Before my injury, I was climbing 8 foot walls and 15 foot ropes to the ceiling. I could knock out 100 burpees in a workout. And here I was now, huffing and puffing in step aerobics.

But I was so happy to be able to move my body without pain that I didn’t care. That time away gave me a deep appreciation for a body that could move without excruciating pain. That mattered more than weight gain, loss of muscle tone, and a drastically altered fitness state. I just cared that I could move! My focus changed. 

Still, as I looked at myself in the mirror every day and saw this new me, I struggled. There are parts that aren't my favorite. Because the thing is, no amount of photo filters, dressing for my body type, magical face creams, organic tonics and elixirs or spanx can change the fact that I’m a flabby, middle aged woman, with 20 pounds to lose, a stubborn hair that keeps growing out of her chin, crepey neck skin, spider vines on her thighs and a receding hair line. That isn't body shaming. It’s just the truth.

But guess what?
Those things don’t describe how my heart feels! My heart feels 20. Or 16. Or sometimes even 12. Light and young and happy and full of life! And when I exercise, the feelings in my heart become louder than the outside voices that fill my head.

When I exercise, my heart says, you are beautiful. Even if I haven’t lost a pound. When I exercise, my heart says, you are strong. My heart says, yes you can climb trees with your kids! My heart says, go ahead, flirt with your husband. My heart says, who cares about that chin hair? Pluck that sucker out and move on!

With time, exercise should change some of that flabbiness and weight gain. But I’ll still never match the standard of outward beauty that the world throws at me. It’s simply not possible. And that’s exactly why I love exercising. Because when I exercise I fall in love with my body for what it is and what it can do, instead of hating it for all that it isn’t.

Ladies, we need to stop lamenting the fact that we don’t look like the photoshopped models we see all around us. Or even like the other women just like us who we see on social media everyday. Instead we need to rejoice that our bodies can nurse babies and bend over to make beds. We should celebrate that we are walking or running, taking step aerobics or going mountain biking. We should be grateful for a mind that is fed and fueled by good books. For a heart that is filled with compassion. For a smile, even one without perfectly white teeth, that fills other people with joy and makes them smile in return. There is so much more to us than those stupid Instagram filters show. Or don’t show.

So let’s stop comparing ourselves to others. Let’s rejoice in what we can do and in who we are—flaws and all. In fact, I pray that we can grow to see ourselves in this way:
“She was beautiful, but not like those girls in the magazines. She was beautiful, for the way she thought. She was beautiful, for the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved. She was beautiful, for her ability to make other people smile, even if she was sad. No, she wasn't beautiful for something as temporary as her looks. She was beautiful, deep down to her soul. She is beautiful.” F Scott Fitzgerald.

Isn't that an incredible description of true beauty? I have that quote hanging in my kitchen to read daily. Because it encapsulates the kind of beauty I long to emanate, the kind that matters most. It’s the opposite of the beauty the world tries to tell me matters most. It’s a beauty that comes from the heart. May we all be that kind of beautiful!
Love you all!
Greta
And because I can't write a post without a book recommendation, here are 3 books on this subject that I want you to read with your kids.  Because we all need to start helping our children, girls and boys, have this understanding of what true beauty is.
The books are: 
The Velveteen Rabbit
The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane
Wonder. 

If your kids are 9 and up, I'd read all 3. If they are younger than that, start with the Velveteen Rabbit and then work your way up to the other 2 books.
And don't just hand the books to them. Read them aloud together! Let the stories sink into your minds and hearts. Talk about them! And then, revisit those stories now and again. Books are such a good place to begin to help our kids that true beauty comes from the inside. 
 

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In Books, adventuring
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Home Schooling 101: How to do Nature Study with your Nature Group

October 10, 2017

The longer I use nature study as the means of teaching my kids science, the more I love it.
It lays such a great foundation for them for further study of the many different branches of science.
“Consider, too, what an unequalled mental training the child-naturalist is getting for any study or calling under the sun — the powers of attention, of discrimination, of patient pursuit, growing with his growth, what will they not fit him for?” (Charlotte Mason Vol. 1, p. 61).

When we first began home schooling,we did nature study on our own.
We’d collect nature finds out on our weekly hikes, come home research them, and then the kids would draw and paint them in their nature notebooks.
It was good, but after a time, I was wanting to do more.

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So several years ago our home school group decided to engage in a more focused method of nature study together.
We’d chose a topic for each term, let our kids to study this topic together, add specific focus to some of our weekly field trips, and then have the kids share presentations with one another at the end of each term.
The focus of our group is for fellowship with one another each week, spending time in and studying nature together, to adventure and learn together.
We weren’t wanting to change into a science co-op.
We just wanted to add a more focused nature/science study to what we were already doing.

With a little planning and thought, our vision became a reality.
It has been a fantastic way for our kids to study science together!

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Here is how our group does it:
Every term we pick a new science topic to study.
To find those topics, we follow the nature study schedule from Ambleside Online.
You can find the nature study schedule  here.

There are 3 topics of study per year, one for fall, winter and spring.
Each family approaches the study in their own way.
We do share resources and ideas, books, websites, and lessons that are working for us.
And when we plan our schedule of field trips, we all try to keep in mind any hikes, classes, or trips that fit into our topic of study and then add those to our schedule.
Its been a great way to add some more focus to our nature study together.

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For example, when we studied weather, we visited the campus of UCLA and attended a class taught by the head of the meteorology department.
We also visited a historic lighthouse.
When we studied stars and sky, we visited the Griffith Observatory and Planetarium in Los Angeles.
And we went to a rocket launch at Vandenberg Air Force Base!
For reptiles, we visited a reptile zoo, and for brooks, rivers, and oceans, we visited tidal flats, some creeks, and tide pools.
For cultivated crops, we visited an olive packing house.
And even on field trips that aren’t specifically focused on our nature study, we can’t help finding ourselves thinking about the topic and seeing it everywhere we go.
Its really fun!
 

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At the end of the term, the kids all do presentations related to the topic of study.
Again, its up to each family how they want to choose the topic.
It seems like most of us just let the kids lead the way picking something that really interests them and is somehow related to our topic.
And they have a great time doing their presentations.
As they have presented on bugs, birds, trees and outer space, they have made dioramas, sculptures, home made food, smoothies, games, and lots of presentation boards.

Of course, standing up in front of a group and presenting also gives our kids those all important socialization skills.
I’m sorry. 
After a lifetime of being asked about socialization, I just can’t resist a little teasing when the topic comes up.
I assure you, presenting to a group of moms, toddlers, pre-schoolers, and an array other, multi-aged elementary students, is a real boost to those social skills.
In fact, our biggest problem is that our kids are all so social, its hard to get them to stop presenting or asking questions after each presentation.
They’ve got this socialization thing in the bag.
 

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Doing nature study this way has been a really great for my kids.
They love learning like this with their friends.
Its given them more focus when we are out together each week.
And more excitement as they discover things together.
 

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For us moms, it hasn’t added any extra work.
In fact, I have found its really given me more direction and excitement to study nature and science this way.
Its become one of my absolute favorite subjects to teach to my kids.
Because basically I am learning alongside them.
I never loved science as a kid, but I sure do now!
“If getting our kids out into nature is a search for perfection, or is one more chore, then the belief in perfection and the chore defeats the joy. It’s a good thing to learn more about nature in order to share this knowledge with children; it’s even better if the adult and child learn about nature together. And it’s a lot more fun.” Richard Louve

For more of my thoughts on nature study, and nature notebooks, you can read my post about it here. And for more on starting your own Nature Group, read my post here. 

Cheers to learning through nature!
Greta

In home schooling, adventuring
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Connecting With Our Kids on the Hiking Trail

May 18, 2017

If I could offer a piece of advice to parents of little ones, it would be this:
don’t forget to think about parenting beyond the now.

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In adventuring, mothering
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Categories:

mothering

marriage

home schooling

Adventuring

Books

It was a good week in fitness land:
•61 miles cycled•
•2 strength training classes•
•2 boot camp classes•
•4 miles power walked•
•1 mile slooooow run•
•2000 meters rowed•
•1 very sore body•
•6 green smoothies for breakfast•
•6 cups of bullet proof coffee• •1 lesson learned —don’t buy kettle potato chips, Greta. You have no will power around those things.•
•2 indulgences—1 cake pop, 1 chocolate bar•
•0 pounds lost•
•SO many good endorphins coursing through my body•
= me making positive  changes in my fitness and nutrition.👊🙌😭 It was 7 years ago this month that I signed up for a 1 month boot camp class. It changed my life! And it set me on a course where I discovered parts of myself that I didn’t know existed. I pushed my body hard and learned it could do way more than I thought it could. I ran my first mile without stopping. Then I ran a half marathon. I discovered I could climb 7 foot walls and ropes that stretched to the top of a tall ceiling. I showed up over and over again and it made a difference.
I found that exercise healed my body, but it also healed my heart. Exercise became my therapy as I dealt with the pain from a traumatic miscarriage and subsequent marriage struggles. I cried while I ran. I sweated out the hurt. And I became stronger, inside and out.
But the best part of working out was the feeling that I could do anything. While I exercised the world felt full of possibility. And I felt unstoppable. It might have only lasted for a minute or two after I ran my fastest mile. Or when I mastered the high monkey bars for the first time. But feeling unstoppable for even one minute? Well, I don’t know about you, but I need those minutes in my life!
I needed them then.
And I need them now. 
Because in many ways I I’m starting all over. I’m coming off a 7 month back injury, chronic, debilitating pain, and way too much emotional eating. I started workouts this spring, and fell flat on my face all summer long.
But I’m not gonna hang onto failure. I’m gonna hang onto the rush that came after that 3 minute sprint on the bike, when my legs and my lungs were on fire, and I pushed through it.
I will fall. And I will get back up.
Every time I turn around he’s making another fort. 
Future architect? Installation artist? Or just a very messy husband? 
I pray for his wife already. 🙏❤️
#ohdavyboy #maandpamodernhome (And don’t worry. He’s not naked. Just in his undies, of course.😉)
The other day I shared some posts in my insta stories about raising passionate children.
And the messages poured in. There were many mentions of tears and of finally being understood. And I thought, “this is why I do this! I have the strength to carry on!” Then yesterday rolled around and I was back in the trenches. And it was brutal. I mean, I don’t know how anyone can fight with a 7 year old, but I sure was doing it. By 3 pm I felt exhausted, defeated, and frustrated. All my “can do spirit” flew right out the window.

I retreated to my room, giving myself a time out, and busied myself by dusting and tidying. Making or finding something beautiful in the middle of an ugly day always helps calm my mind and my soul. Even if it’s only for a minute.
And, of course, as I worked, I reflected. 
In my years of parenting two passionate children I’ve learned a lot. 
I’ve sighed a lot.
I’ve cried a lot.
I’ve prayed a lot.
I’ve had to let go of a lot.
I’ve laughed a lot.
And over the years I’ve come to realize that the passion in my kids that sometimes makes them so incredibly difficult to parent was put there by God.
Their fire is not an accident.

But that fire does need tending. We can’t let it burn out of control. How do we do that? I’m not sure! Clearly I haven’t figured it all out yet. Still I press on. 
What I do know is that often we feel we are supposed to break the will of the strong willed child. How many times have you heard, “what that kid needs is a strong hand!”
But I think we need to bend that wild and passionate heart towards God,not  break it.
It isn’t easy.
Oh no, it is not easy.

So I try hard to see the positive parts of their passion, not dwell on the difficult parts. I strive to see the good in them and rejoice in it! I pray for God to use it. 
I know God can do great things with passionate men and women who were once passionate children. That is my prayer for my wild hearted ones. Not that they’ll lose their fire. But that God will shape it into something mighty. 
If you’re in the trenches with me, I hope you’ll make that your prayer too.  And I’m starting a new hashtag for this stuff: #gretagetsreal ❤️✨
I had the best time talking all things nature, adventure, and home schooling with Angela and Maren of the @homeschoolunrefined podcast. 
I gave some of my best tips for getting out in nature, why driving long distances for a good hike is worth it, and how books shaped my love of nature and the outdoors. I’m sure I talked way too much, but hey, I’m a story teller. 🤷🏼‍♀️😉😂
You can listen to our conversation by finding them on iTunes, Spotify or even on their website. I hope you’ll hop over and give it a listen. 
Also, I just posted some of our favorite adventuring supplies in my amazon shop—our fave back packs, pocket knives, water purifier, and gummy bears for when you gotta get those kids up that last hill. Cause I know you’ll be inspired to go adventuring after listening to this episode! Link to the shop in my profile. ❤️🌲🐾🛶🏕🎒
#gretatalks #maandpamodernadventures
#maandpamodernhike
Well my girl Betsy is killing it with her new ig account @homeschoolingwiththeclassics Have you seen it? It’s hilarious!
But she did make me think twice about posting this Finnish proverb on learning. I guess it’s a home school cliche or something. 🙄. Whatever Betsy. I still love it.
Because joy is one of my love languages. So I want you to remember this cliche Finnish proverb as you’re starting your new school year. And don’t forget to add JOY to your lesson plans and to your own heart. Because the perfect curriculum or planned out school year, won’t go very far with a stressed out, overwhelmed mom.
Home schooling is hard. There’s no denying it. But on the hardest of days, you don’t have to slog through just so you can put a check mark in the boxes of your lesson plan book. You have to freedom to teach with joy!! So plan for it. Add in some of the things that will bring joy to your kids’ learning and to your teaching. 
You will all be better for it. I promise.
Be gentle with yourself and them. Teach with joy that they may learn with joy. Happy back to school friends!
You’ve got this!
#maandpamodernhomeschool
Hi there! I’m Greta, and I’m on a mission to protect kids from the dangerous, and devastating effects of pornography.

This wasn’t a mission I ever expected to  have. It certainly wasn’t one I asked for. But God has a way of calling us to step up and do things we never imagined we could, just to show us that with Him, ALL things are possible.

So here I am, growing more passionate about this by the minute. At first it was so scary, embarrassing, awkward, and difficult to talk about this. But all of that is slipping away the more I learn. Because the truth about pornography is horrifying.  And I can’t worry about being awkward when there are so many lives at stake.

Honestly, the most difficult part now is how emotionally draining this all is. I’m often sad and angry by the things I research, the messages I get, and the ugly truths I’m learning. However, God, in His divine goodness, provides comic relief in this process. 
First, I’m laughing because I’m the most unlikely candidate for the job . I don’t know a sexual innuendo if it bites me on the booty. Therefore I often say the wrong thing and we all laugh. (See my stories) Comic relief is sure needed and appreciated with this  heavy topic. 
Second, there’s you guys. Who so awkwardly come up to me and say, “uhh, hi Greta. I just, umm, wanted to say, umm, that I love, ummm, the stuff you’re doing with porn.” And your faces are red and you’re so awkward and I’m just dying with laugher cause I get it!  But also because I never imagined anyone would EVER say that to me! 
So I laugh every time and it puts us at ease. Which is good. Because pornography is painful and difficult and tears often follow up the laughter as you share your stories.

I guess what I want you to know is that “Greta, the girl who is fighting porn” is here to stay. With all the awkwardness and missteps I’ll make along the way, I’m going to keep talking. And I appreciate you listening. The very first step you can take in this fight against pornography is to in join the conversation.

See lots of resources to help you FIGHT porn in my highlights on my profile page. Please go take a look!
#gretafightsporn
PS. New hair by @reginadoes ✨✨
Ever since I had my first child potty trained and in undies, it’s been a constant underwear parade around  here.

I mean, the minute we stepped in the front door my kids started stripping clothes off like it was their job. Although that was never a career choice I advocated.😂. They just all loved being in their undies, all.the.time.

One of my nieces even said that she wanted to be home schooled like James, William and Lilly, because then she could go to school in just her underwear. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Truth.

Knowing all that, you can understand why I almost fell on the floor laughing when I read this meme on @homeschoolingwiththeclassics . Isn’t it the absolute best?

You must go follow my friend Betsy over on @homeschoolingwiththeclassics . She’s a home school mother to a passel of boys, and a comic genius. I love her for so many reasons, her sarcastic wit being one of them.

But seriously, the laughs I just had over there. 😂😂😂 Thanks a million Bets! You’re the absolute best!

#maandpamodernhomeschool
If my kids ever doubt my love for them, please remind them I said yes to baking chocolate chip cookies in the heat of summer. This turning my kitchen into a 5 hundred and 67 trillion degree hot box.
So yeah, kids.
It’s pretty obvious my love for you knows no bounds.
I’ll endure heat rage for your sake.
Enough said. ❤️😡😍
#maandpamoderncook
So I’ve had lots of requests for an audio recording of my talk on Books and nature from this past weekend.
Unfortunately I can’t offer you that. I’m so sorry.
But take heart! 
I have some other ways for you all to hear me share on this topic that is so near and dear to my heart.
First, you can read the blog post I wrote called, “Learning to Love Nature Through Literature.” It’s an excerpt of my talk and contains a rad book list of books that have inspired my love of nature. 
Second, you can listen to my talk on @readaloudrevival episode 62, where Sarah and I talk about, you guessed it, books and nature! 
I’ve linked the blog post and podcast in my stories.
I’ve also got a link for you to the little “book shop” I’ve curated for you on amazon. It has a bunch of cool resources for you like our favorite nature journaling books, favorite nature journaling supplies (best pencil sharpener, and that adorable, colorful journal) and my fave books to inspire parents to get their kids outdoors. The link is in my profile. Go visit! 
I wish so badly I could travel  everywhere to speak to all of you in person. (I’m especially willing to travel to Europe!😉) But until then, I’ll keep creating as many other resources for you as I can right here on the good old interwebs.
Check out my profile and my stories for all the links! Love you all, my nature nerds! ❤️🤓🌲🐾🍄🐞
#gretatalks #maandpamodernnaturestudy  #maandpamodernread